She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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