no, he came in my armpit
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize