are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
