Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Are we still banned from the library?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
