well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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