I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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