my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
