i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
