i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Randomize
