To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
