I think I died a long time ago.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize