O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
