What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
