Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
