Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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