Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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