I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
