Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
worst night to have a conscience
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
