he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
