it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
