She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
