There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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