I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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