I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
