I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
