i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
