this boner is exhausting
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
