Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Never underestimate the power of titties
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
