Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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