She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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