She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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