were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
