it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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