I need help removing her.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
