The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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