i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
