You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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