the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
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