i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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