do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
