My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
