I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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