Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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