White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
