The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
