friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
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