There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
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