Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
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