You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
