And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
