i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Dear god my vagina.
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