Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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